Wednesday, December 18, 2013
tried to find Bill Burroughs too, and learned that he had just left for
South America with his family, so Bill Burroughs had finally sunk from
our sight and was gone. Then I got fever and became delirious and
unconscious. I looked up out of the dark swirl of my mind and I knew I
was on a bed eight thousand feet above sea level, on a roof of the
world, and I knew that I had lived a whole life and many others in the
poor atomistic husk of my flesh, and I had all the dreams. And I saw
Neal bending over the kitchen table. It was several nights later and he
was leaving Mexico City. “What you doing man?” I moaned. “Poor Jack,
poor Jack you’re sick. Frank’ll take care of you. Now listen if you can
in your sickness---I got my divorce from Carolyn down here and I’m
driving back to Diane in NY if the car holds out.” “All that again?” I
cried. “All that again, good buddy. Gotta get back to my life. Wish I
could stay with you. Pray I can come back.” I grabbed the cramps in my
belly and groaned. When I looked up again Neal was standing with his old
broken trunk and looking down at me. I didn’t know who he was anymore,
and he knew this, and sympathized, and pulled the blanket over my
shoulders. “Yes, yes, yes, I’ve got to go now.” And he was gone. Twelve
hours later in my sorrowful fever I finally came to understand that he
was gone. By this time he was driving back alone through those banana
mountains, this time at night, black night, secret night, holy night.
BOOK FIVE:- A week later the Korean War began. Neal drove from Mexico
City and saw Gregor again in Victoria and pushed that old car all the
way to Lake Charles La. before the rear-end finally dropped on the road
as he always knew it would and he wired Diane for $32 airplane fare and
flew the rest of the way. Arriving in NY with the divorce papers in his
hand he and Diane immediately went to Newark and got married; and that
night, telling her everything was all right and not to worry, and making
logics where there was nothing but inestimable sorrowful sweats, he
jumped on a bus and roared off again across the awful continent to San
Francisco to rejoin Carolyn and the two baby girls. So now he was
thrice-married, twice-divorced, and living with his second wife. In the
Fall I myself started back from Mexico City and one night just over
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